I’ve been absent for two weeks. I wasn’t planning to be gone so long, it just sort of happened. And I’ve been feeling really guilty, because my lack of blogging has become part of a long list of insufficiencies in my life over the past few weeks—not enough money, not enough work on my business, nowhere near looking after myself properly.
Not that all this started two weeks ago—I’ve been short on funds for some time, scraping by each week by paying only the bills that absolutely need to be paid.
I’ve also not been respecting my body so much. Being generally unwell for such a long time—over two years—with no end in sight, I gave up on eating right and exercising late last year. My body responded by slowly falling apart even more—go figure!—to the point where, two weeks ago, I woke up unable to physically move or stay away for more than minutes at a time. I panicked. But then I went to the doctor and she reminded me that I’d had a pretty major organ removed recently, so I probably should feel drained after a ten hour day of moving furniture and boxes. Duh!
So that leaves not enough work on my little business endeavour. I’ve done next to nothing on writing copy, working on marketing, or creating administration templates and procedures in the past month. I’ve also recently put a hold on all work with my only client. I’ve essentially gone backwards. In fact, I’ve decided to take the next couple of months away from the business, and work as a checkout chick at the local corner store-cum-supermarket to squirrel away some cash.
Cut to feeling like a complete and utter failure at both business and life.
All of a sudden the burdens have lifted a little, and I don’t feel quite so much like the kid at the back of the class eating paste. Laura’s right—entrepreneurship doesn’t usually result in magically going from start-up to billion-dollar-corporation. And there’s no need to compare my business journey to anyone else’s, because there’s nothing similar about it. If all my peers are doing the same as me then I should give up now, because I’m banking on success through providing a unique product!
Most of all, Laura’s last line, “Your path is beautiful and crooked and just as it should be”, really struck home—for both my business and personal life, and reminded me that I’m exactly where I am supposed to be right now.
So many times the good develops directly from the bad. Of course, this has a lot do to with the right decisions, hard work, and patience, but it’s also because that’s how it’s meant to be. Life happens the way it should, and we merely tweak the direction we take by choosing one path instead of another—neither right nor wrong, both just different, but equally wonderful.