NIIA Week: CFS Acid-Wall

Suitably, today was a perfect example of a typical ME/CFS overdoing-it day. I spent the morning and most of the afternoon running around doing errands, and cleaning the house I’ve been house-sitting. After a week of very little sleep, I was exhausted and knew I shouldn’t go to work, bit I’ve missed so many shifts the last few weeks, I pushed myself to go anyway.

I was there all of ten minutes when the acid-wall hit. Nope, I’m not taking acid, but I think I have the feeling down pat. See, when I get really tired I got through three stages. The first is delirium, where everything is funny and nothing I say makes sense. Then I start to feel like every bone and muscle in my body is made of cement, and everything becomes a series of counting-and-breathing to get anywhere. This is the stage I usually give in at because it starts to take longer and longer to get things. If I make it past this point the acid wall sets it. My skin starts to crawl and itch, my blood starts to race, and my mind begins to move both way too fast and way too slow at the same time. Suddenly I start sweating, the room starts to rock like a boat, and I can’t focus my eyes so everything becomes blurred and spinning. I can’t function for long at this stage, and eventually have to at least sit down before I fall over or pass out.

When I reached the acid-wall today I tried to push through it, and succeeded for about twenty minutes before giving up and going home. I walked in the door, went straight to bed, and slept the sleep of ages for five hours. Now the acid-wall hangover has set in and I feel spacey and achy and frustrated with myself, because it’s my own fault. Sometimes I forget to slow down, and then I pay the price. A great CFS lesson I still haven’t learnt from…

 

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